Monday, 13 June 2016

Royal Fucking Ascot

Howdy Folks..

Its another great week in equine calendar as we move into June and its Royal Ascot a incredible week of blue blood investment on show and hopefully some classic races although im becoming less and less a flat aficionado as my love for NH grows however the odd week like this does spike my interest.

All this in / out Brexit/Remain bollocks has me bubbling for a mammoth Friday rant so watch this space!!!...


Back to racing...

Its Ascot a course for fucking halfwits and self satisfying self fellating cock ends and the odd nice hat.
A course that i fucking despise and a course much like newbury where form is not worth a brown finger and the week is to be taken in the spirit of horse racing and the wallet bulging bookies.

However its the Royal course and its a week to get all the fucking toff racing out of the way in one fell swoop..so enjoy Quentin et al coz you can fuck off after this.

So..who really wants to follow a very pious me at a course i hate in conditions that make it harder than normal in a year where little inspires...only the foolhardy and my friends thats who...so fingers crossed i can nail a winner or two for my cock sucking pals who have gone down on a 4 day jolly ( the wankers ).

RACE 1 
The Queen Anne Stakes over 1m for 4yo+ and it looks a decent field this to be honest.
Kodi Bear should be a lot better now with a spin under his belt and that is also the same for Amazing Maria both of whom i like as EW longshots but my money will very loyally be staying on BELARDO who i have already gained a very sweet profit on this term and i think there is more to come but this wont be easy by any means and he will need to be on top of his game as there are others who want to turn tables and break historic data records like Esoterique and Mondaliste plus the hidden danger of Tepin.

****Ran 2nd @ 9/2 and hit 1.50 in the run but a nice EW start for me as i got on at 13/2.

RACE 2
The Coventry and a ball acher with 19 runners and for pre pubescent 2yos what a fucking nightmare for punters.
Aiden V Joseph , Wesley V the Weather , Last time out winners V the field......

This is a tricky race however MOKARRIS has for me some very smart times and if coming on for that last run it will take a very good horse to beat him because looking through the big field you notice an awful lot of dead wood with form figures that flatter more than impress.Carvaggio @ 2/1 is a MAX LAY.

****Mokarris did absolutely fuck all here racing up the middle with little cover and sulked whilst the Fav was very very impressive and looks a seriously good horse but still a win as i traded my Lay off when it hit 5.4...;)

RACE 3
Next up its the King Stand a 5f super sprint but with 21 runners this is truly insane.
MECCAS ANGEL is a true super star in the sprinting ranks and for me is the winner but im not really interested in the 15/8 on offer so will look elsewhere for a sporting punt.
MUTHMIR is a horse ive always liked however it has always really let me down and owes me some payback.
Muthmir who has Won the Skybet Dash and a King George Stakes whilst also coming third in this very race among other lesser wins including a decent place in France and if Moofy is in the groove he will will have every chance of running into a place or better and at 16/1 is jsut the right side of Value and for me is a very decent EW bet.

****Muthmir was a Non Runner so nothing here for me either way although Meccas Angel ran a shocker.

RACE 4
Now we have for me one of my favourite races not only of the week but the whole year...im simply love the ST JAMES PALACE STAKES over 1m and always gets a good winner...from the days of Warning and Zilzal to Frankel have i always loved this.

Awtaad looks nice and got the run of the race at the Curragh and wont be so lucky here, The Ghurka looks very useful however the French form is weak so that leaves only one other option ( as this is a 3 runner race for me ) and that is GALILEO GOLD ( NAP ) and at 13/2 is one of the best EW bets you will ever come across as i believe this is nailed on for a place and has every chance of winning....13/2 for a UK Guineas winner that was caught in a pocket in the Irish version and generally suffered a poor ride and this class animal will show his colours here today and the stronger the pace the better for a horse considered as a possible Derby Fav....13/2....Lump the fuck on EW.


*****GALILEO GOLD 1st - Ran a cracker with a super ride from Frankie...left the other two Guineas winners in his wake although i think wit a better ride The Ghurka will be closer next time..fucking Moore is useless...

RACE 5
This Ascot Stakes race over 2m4f leaves me a bit cold to be honest and im struggling to gather any fucking interest whatsoever.
I think Silver Concorde will have a good Go whilst Willie Mullins will be keen to add to his flat tally not forgetting Gallizi however im sticking with me old chum Henderson and his NO HERETIC who last seen Won the Chester Cup and will be fully primed for a tilt here and will be fitter for that run and the 14/1 looks a decent enough price.

**Held up by Spencer for a late run but weakened before being produced...unplaced

RACE 6
The Finale is the Windsor Castle Stakes for 2 yos over 5f and has been a race that ive never done more than fuck all in.
TOMILLY from the yet to really fire stable of Hannon is the one for me at 10/1 in a race that only your gut instinct can be followed.

****This stable is in disarray and Hannon Snr will be coming out of retirement if this continues as the older dominate force of Hannon is now quickly turning into a stable of mediocrity and disappointment.


Best bets for me is £50 EW doubles and trebles on all selections through the card although im tempted to just cut the risk and have an EW Heinz or Canadian....GALILEO GOLD is an outstanding bet and is truly worth emptying every penny out of every account and sticking it on in the place market.....


Good Luck fuckers...enjoy a cracking Day 1.

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